Feedback

On the following monday (from the 3rd session), we recieved feedback regarding the outline that was submitted, so we could make alterations to the script (that was due in that thursday). (Feedback is displayed below)

 So in an attempt to add clarity to the script and address the points brought up by the feedback, I set off the try to write the script (only to be hit by writer's block); although I was also conscious that the script had to be two and a bit pages long (one page equals one minute), so by attempting to add clarity I ended up making it more convoluted with additional dialogue and a voice-over. (Below is a copy of the script)

As you can see, most of these additions do not work (like the voice over) and were mainly put in to try to address the feedback (and to fill it out a bit), but it will be discussed at the next session.